People have the ability to use search engines to look for anything they wish with the intent of finding some obscurity(i.e the measurements of the bathrooms in toledo vs. the measurements in montreal) or something commonplace such as a picture of a balloon.
Someone the other day used such a tool and typed in these words “I forgot how to feel” and this person was somehow directed to my blog. I can’t necessarily say that my blog is either unfeeling or worthy to be called a go-to for such a problem. However, I can say I have been there; I know what its like to not feel anything. Its one of the most odd, insane, terrible, and nauseating states to be in. In my experience its a state that can last consistently for a good long time, or you can go in and out of it for days, weeks, even months. I am no doctor and I’ve never wrote a book on the subject but I can tell you its curable.
I am, aside from the occasional bad day, one of the most positive, feeling people I know. I can get quite sappy too. I cried watching 300 yesterday. That movie is nothing more than a bunch of ripped guys running around in loin cloths with capes killing people. But it was heroic-the emotion that flooded out of the tv was moving. I used to never cry in movies. Ever. But then I realized a few things….
Feeling is not necessarily something that happens to you-its something you allow to affect you. I would venture to say its you opening up that feeling center of the brain and allowing actions, words, thoughts, memories, deeds, people, scenes etc. to impact you. Its like you actually reaching into your heart and allowing yourself to feel empathy for little Bambi. Start out small. Show compassion for someone hurting.
And I used to have walls, but I realized vulnerability is a part of feeling. You have to get vulnerable in order to feel. Don’t be afraid to let people see your tears, hear your squeals of laughter, or feel your anguish. I’m no longer afraid to let people see me when I am weeping.
One last thing; prayer. If you have never prayed before, it might be something you will want to try.
Thanks for reading my random and uncollected thoughts 🙂